Retreat Weekend

I went on a retreat last weekend with my mission organization. Our unit, about 20 people, got together out in Jinja for a relaxing weekend. We had meetings about our vision and mission statement, how we can better pray for one another, and general praise and worship time. These weekends are always fun and such an adventure when you figure in that you have to take public transportation to get there.

There was a group of 5 of us that met up in town on Friday afternoon and found our way to the bus park. We figured a bus might be a little more comfortable than a taxi. The only problem is the bus usually takes much longer to fill than a taxi and you wait in the hot, sweaty, non-air conditioned bus. We had to wait about 30 minutes and then we were off…well sort of. We hit a jam just outside the park and waited another 20 minutes standing completely still. Hysterical. During the bus trip a young man got up and started walking up and down the aisle selling medicine, toothpaste and even tooth powder that he said would help prevent cavities. It was like a live infomercial.

We finally made it to Jinja and the first thing we did was drop our bags and jump in the pool. So refreshing after a 3.5 hour journey on taxi, bus and boda. It’s funny how much more I am aware of my safety or lack of safety here. I am constantly praying on public transport. Maybe this was God’s way of increasing my prayer life.

Saturday I spent the morning in fellowship and group meetings and then spent the afternoon with my accountability/prayer partner. I have a mentor here and we meet once a month to pray together and just talk about life. Today the subject was my plans for the future now that I am down to about 2 months left in country. Banange. I told her I was pretty much open to whatever. And I feel like that’s the problem. I can see like twelve different paths I can take from here. So here are my options:

• Come back to Dwelling Places next March for another year to finish some work in the office and do staff training
• Go home and go to Bible school to get the necessary credits needed to do missions full time. But where is a big question…DC? FL? SC?
• Join TIMO and go to an unreached people group for two years
• Go home to Florida and get a job
• Go back to DC and get a job

If any of you have a strong opinion about what you think God wants me to do please feel free to chime in. I am at a loss at this point. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t worried. I know I shouldn’t be and I know the scriptures that tell us not to be anxious but I am a bit anxious about coming home to no car, no home and no job. I just wish God would give me some sort of road map as to what he wants from me next. But I don’t think that’s how he works. I think he prefers to have us rely on him faithfully to provide for our future. It helps grow us in maturity in him. I hate this process.

I also am a bit scared to think of what the ramifications are of saying I want to be a full time missionary. My life would radically change from how it used to be. I don’t think I can say whether that is good or bad…it would just be different. It is nothing I ever considered before. I didn’t grow up in a church that hosted visiting missionaries. I didn’t even know what a missionary was until like 4 years ago. This was never a dream of mine. I always wanted to live in DC. Matter of fact I had my sights set nice and high – I wanted to be the press secretary for the President. Haha. I would hate that job now but living and working in DC was definitely a dream of mine. When I left there 9 months ago I left my dream life. Honestly. But maybe that was the point. Maybe it was too much mine and not enough of God’s dreams for me. Who knows. I am rambling at this point.

The weekend ended on Sunday with a nice long journey back to Kampala. I shouldn’t complain too much as I pretty much passed out as soon as we got on the taxi. Apparently the sunrise runs over the weekend tired me out. I woke up to the lady next to me resting her head on my shoulder as she and her baby slept. We hit a jam returning to town and had to take a huge detour. We went through some small villages and then got stuck trying to go up this muddy hill. Sarah and I were sharing a row and we both looked to our left to see how big the ditch was that was next to us. We both agreed it was a shallow ditch and if the bus were to tip it would be a short fall. Somehow this was reassuring to us. We made it up the hill after sliding sideways for a few feet and then finally made our way to taxi park in town. One more taxi until we are home.

After town I went over to a friend’s house for a goodbye dinner. He is returning back to the states after being out here for the past year serving in the HIV/AIDS ministry. Saying bye never gets any easier and it happens a lot here. I was counting, and I have had 10 roommates this year that have come and gone and many other friends. I have not stopped being amazed at how God has provided for such amazing friends this past year. I moved here not knowing anyone and yet I have been blessed with great roommates, close friends and people I know I will keep in touch with for a lifetime.

Please pray for short term missionaries. Many of them are trying to figure out what to do next just like me. We all struggle to make sense of our time in country and how that affects our world perspective and what that means for our futures. Please pray for missionaries around the world struggling to hear God’s leading in their lives and for strength, wisdom and discernment to make tough decisions.